S and I are planning on moving back to the US in August. My contract is up here in mid-July (but my visa ends in June, so I’m not sure exactly how that will play out), then we’re off to India for a nuptial ceremony, and then somewhere. We aren’t exactly sure where yet. Probably DC, at least initially, because we have a place we can live there, and, you know, having a place to live is important for us (we’re snooty that way). Then it depends on where we can find jobs.
S seems relatively confident that she can find something in DC. I’m not very optimistic about my own prospects in DC or anywhere else for that matter. The well is dry for wannabe professors right now. There are jobs being advertised, but they are being bombarded with applicants (last year I was getting “thanks-but-no-thanks” letters quoting 150 applicants, now it’s 600). I suspect only the 10s and 9s are being considered. There’s just nothing out there for the solid 7s like myself. Here’s an excerpt from a state-of-the-union email from a bigwig in the math department at my graduate school (I suspect it might as well be any public US college).
Attached is a dismal summary of math jobs available over the past couple of years -- from the Amer. Math. Soc. (AMS). The figures are pretty grim and probably should not have been called "highlights".
In particular the attached document from the AMS says: "The total tenure-track positions filled during the 2009-2010 academic cycle by all mathematics departments combined was 479, down 33% from the 2008-2009 total of 710. This total is down 51% from the 2007-2008 fi gure of 978, the highest total over the past ten years."
State budgets (and so state funded universities and colleges) are cutting compare with last year due to the end of President Obama's federal stimulus. Estimate that the math budget (which is practically all salaries) will be down about 7% next year compared with the 2007-8 academic year. We have done and continue to do lots of cutting.
This email didn’t really brighten my day, but what did brighten my day was the gmail status of a guy I went to grad school with who must be graduating soon and applying for professorships himself: “Dear Applicant: We are pleased to inform you, we fucked your mom. There were many qualified applicants and we fucked all their moms.”
Now that is hilarious. One possible saving grace for me is that I haven’t really scratched the surface of industry jobs yet. Things probably ain’t great there either, but they can’t be as bad as academia.
Anyway… speaking of, um, eff-ing things I got duped by a troll on an MMA site. I was checking out some UFC highlights online, and there was a live chat going on. I wasn’t taking part in it, but people were putting up links to cool videos, so I was clicking through them. After a few legitimate ones, I clicked one and the heads of a horse and a woman popped up and a headline read BEST IN BESTIA--. I immediately closed the window. I can guess how that second word ends. Luckily for me the page was a tiny bit slow in loading, so I didn’t see anything traumatizing. God bless my quick-closing skills.
Two things on this. First, to whoever put that link up, what the hell? You don’t even know if anybody is clicking it. You don't get to watch people’s responses. Where’s the enjoyment? It’s just asshole-ism for the pure sake of asshole-ism. It's like putting a nail in the street and then walking away. Eventually somebody will probably pop their tire, but you'll be long gone.
Second, I was thinking about the parents of the woman whose face I briefly saw, and it got me thinking. As long as bestiality porn is around, gun control laws should be very lax. If I ever found out my daughter was participating in something like that, I would like to be able to purchase a gun, so that I could shoot myself in the head. There’s just no coming back from that.
OK, on to a less disturbing topic. Ultimate Frisbee is going pretty good. It’s quite fun, but I could do without the love circle. At the end of a match, both teams get together and embrace, arms-around-shoulders, in a circle while the captains each give a talk about the spirit of the game, and friendly competition, and all this other nonsense. We can’t just give each other high fives and hit the bar?
Our team is not good, by the way. We lost our first match to a team who didn’t win at all last season. That does not bode well for us. I’m actually decent. My throwing skills aren’t amazing, but they aren’t bad, and I can run and catch pretty well. (I probably need to keep in mind the non-contact nature of the sport as well. I committed the only two fouls during match.) I doubt I’ll ever be particularly good, but I can play without looking like a complete train wreck. Nobody on our team is terrible, actually. It’s just that nobody is really good either. Nobody is a handler (the equivalent of a point guard in basketball). If we had just one decent handler, we probably wouldn’t be half bad.
Oh well, even if we don’t ever win, it’s fun and good exercise. It beats running on the treadmill next to the dude with too much cologne on (which is what I did today), that’s for sure.
Can't you stay in Australia another year? Why can't your contract be extended? Does the university / your department like the work you are doing? Don't come back to the U.S. Your hunch is right -- it sucks here in many ways and is only gradually and slowly getting better. Another year in Australia would be ideal for you (assuming that's what you and S. want).
ReplyDeleteAssuming you aren't staying beyond the early NH summer / early SH winter cut off date, I need to consider how I would visit you. I am emailing you at your gmail account. I just want to toss an idea out there.
By the way, please check out this Salon article involving what an Australian newscaster (Belinda Heggen) said on the air: here. Just curious if you know who is this woman? It appears she is in Adelaide, so probably not.
Correction to link: HERE.
ReplyDeleteThat should work. It's very brief but quite startling what she says.