My youngest cousin is getting married on Saturday in Joplin, Missouri, and I will be in attendance. I'm flying out tomorrow morning and flying back early Monday morning. This is the under-card trip to my main event two-week vacation to the PNW at the end of the month. Actually, my initial reaction was to not go to the wedding because of my big trip; it took some coaxing from my wife to make me realize there was no reason I couldn't do both. Here's a conversation that transpired a few months ago.
Me: We got an invitation for my cousin's wedding. It's June 6. Aw, that sucks. I guess we can't go, bad timing.
Her: Why can't we go?
Me: Well, you will be super pregnant, and then we will have to bring Lil' S, and that will be a nightmare.
Her: Well, you could go by yourself. I'll watch Lil' S.
Me: Yeah, but that won't work. I have the big trip out to visit the fam at the end of the month -- remember?
Her: Yeah, so?
Me: We'll have to buy another ticket. We can't just buy another plane ticket?
Her: Why not? We can afford it.
Me: Yeah, but I'll have to take time off from work.
Her: Just a day or two; you can just go for weekend.
Me: Yeah, but ... Hey, you're right! I can go! I love you, babe! You're the best wife ever!!!*
*Conversation not exact.
The thing is, even though I've been out of grad school for five years now, I still haven't completely shaken my grad school mindset. In grad school, I didn't have the money to just fly somewhere for a weekend. I had to save for all my trips and basically could take only one a year. I wouldn't dream of taking two trips in the same month. But more than the money was the time. (After all, if I really wanted to do something and didn't have the cash, I could put it on my credit card, like I did with a trip to Vegas back in aught-six. Totally worth it, by the way.) There was no such thing as idle time back then; there were no free weekends. I basically had to budget my time as if every moment I wasn't sleeping or in the classroom or expunging my bowels had to be devoted to doing research (and even with the latter I'd often bring my books into the bathroom with me). Of course, I did take breaks, and I did go on vacation, but they were few and far between, and I had to plan long in advance and structure my schedule accordingly. It's still a weird feeling for me to just be able to "do nothing" for a weekend and not fall behind. As long my kid is covered, there is nothing that I legitimately have to do on the weekends -- no research, no grading. Like I said, even though I'm five years remove from grad school, it still takes some getting used to. I guess 13 years of higher education leaves some deep imprints on a man.
And by the way, we shall see if now that S actually is super pregnant -- it's not just an abstract idea in the future -- she will regret giving me the go-ahead to leave her alone with our impish son for the weekend. Actually, I think she will be fine. She's arranged an overnight trip with one of our friends who has three kids to some place called Sesame Street Land or something like that. So that will take up most the weekend. Plus, at least for me, sometimes it's easier to take care of Lil' S by myself, because he acts differently when there is only one of us around, and because I can do everything the way I want to do it -- maybe that's just me though.
Anyway, since I still have to pack, I'm a bit short on time tonight, but I did want to touch on the big story of the week. The "birth" of Caitlyn Jenner. What a weird story -- not a bad one, of course, but a weird one. It's not everyday that the former "Greatest Male Athlete in the World" transitions into being a female. (Although in The World According to Garp, John Irving did create a transgender ex-football player, Roberta Muldoon, played in the movie by John Lithgow.)
The most amazing thing to me about the story is how accepting of Caitlyn the general public is. We've come so far as a society on the acceptance of LGBT people just in my adult lifetime it's amazing -- and legitimately heartwarming. Sure, we've still got the haters -- people like Mike Huckabee, Rick Santorum, Ted Cruz, and even one or two who aren't Republican presidential candidates (hey-o!) -- but these people are becoming more and more marginalized and looking more and more like the bigoted dinosaurs they are with each passing day. We're moving in the right direction on this one. I really believe this. On other issues like systemic racism, the War on Drugs, inequality, and climate change, well, let's just say I'm not quite as optimistic. But those are topics for another day.
Until next time ...
Me: We got an invitation for my cousin's wedding. It's June 6. Aw, that sucks. I guess we can't go, bad timing.
Her: Why can't we go?
Me: Well, you will be super pregnant, and then we will have to bring Lil' S, and that will be a nightmare.
Her: Well, you could go by yourself. I'll watch Lil' S.
Me: Yeah, but that won't work. I have the big trip out to visit the fam at the end of the month -- remember?
Her: Yeah, so?
Me: We'll have to buy another ticket. We can't just buy another plane ticket?
Her: Why not? We can afford it.
Me: Yeah, but I'll have to take time off from work.
Her: Just a day or two; you can just go for weekend.
Me: Yeah, but ... Hey, you're right! I can go! I love you, babe! You're the best wife ever!!!*
*Conversation not exact.
The thing is, even though I've been out of grad school for five years now, I still haven't completely shaken my grad school mindset. In grad school, I didn't have the money to just fly somewhere for a weekend. I had to save for all my trips and basically could take only one a year. I wouldn't dream of taking two trips in the same month. But more than the money was the time. (After all, if I really wanted to do something and didn't have the cash, I could put it on my credit card, like I did with a trip to Vegas back in aught-six. Totally worth it, by the way.) There was no such thing as idle time back then; there were no free weekends. I basically had to budget my time as if every moment I wasn't sleeping or in the classroom or expunging my bowels had to be devoted to doing research (and even with the latter I'd often bring my books into the bathroom with me). Of course, I did take breaks, and I did go on vacation, but they were few and far between, and I had to plan long in advance and structure my schedule accordingly. It's still a weird feeling for me to just be able to "do nothing" for a weekend and not fall behind. As long my kid is covered, there is nothing that I legitimately have to do on the weekends -- no research, no grading. Like I said, even though I'm five years remove from grad school, it still takes some getting used to. I guess 13 years of higher education leaves some deep imprints on a man.
And by the way, we shall see if now that S actually is super pregnant -- it's not just an abstract idea in the future -- she will regret giving me the go-ahead to leave her alone with our impish son for the weekend. Actually, I think she will be fine. She's arranged an overnight trip with one of our friends who has three kids to some place called Sesame Street Land or something like that. So that will take up most the weekend. Plus, at least for me, sometimes it's easier to take care of Lil' S by myself, because he acts differently when there is only one of us around, and because I can do everything the way I want to do it -- maybe that's just me though.
Anyway, since I still have to pack, I'm a bit short on time tonight, but I did want to touch on the big story of the week. The "birth" of Caitlyn Jenner. What a weird story -- not a bad one, of course, but a weird one. It's not everyday that the former "Greatest Male Athlete in the World" transitions into being a female. (Although in The World According to Garp, John Irving did create a transgender ex-football player, Roberta Muldoon, played in the movie by John Lithgow.)
The most amazing thing to me about the story is how accepting of Caitlyn the general public is. We've come so far as a society on the acceptance of LGBT people just in my adult lifetime it's amazing -- and legitimately heartwarming. Sure, we've still got the haters -- people like Mike Huckabee, Rick Santorum, Ted Cruz, and even one or two who aren't Republican presidential candidates (hey-o!) -- but these people are becoming more and more marginalized and looking more and more like the bigoted dinosaurs they are with each passing day. We're moving in the right direction on this one. I really believe this. On other issues like systemic racism, the War on Drugs, inequality, and climate change, well, let's just say I'm not quite as optimistic. But those are topics for another day.
Until next time ...
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