S and the kids return tonight, so my sojourn in a house of my own is coming to an end. Originally they were going to come back on Monday, but S moved the flight to tonight. She was getting worn out being with the kids by herself at her parents' new place in Tampa. It's in a gated retirement community, so there aren't many (any?) other kids around, and if you want to go anywhere to do anything off the premises, you have to drive for like 20 minutes. There is a pool there, which is great, but pools are exhausting for parents of kids under 10. Young kids don't want to lay in the shade and relax; they want to go-go-go constantly, and you can't just zone out and let them do their thing, because you have to play the role of lifeguard. I like going to pools, because the kids have so much fun, but they also stress me out.
S's parents try to help out, especially her mom, but she has trouble physically keeping up with them. S's dad will hang out with them, but only on his terms. Once they start getting a little bit rambunctious (i.e., act like normal kids their age), he gets frustrated and gets upset or retreats to another room. So, it's mostly on us when we visit her parents, and when you're alone, it can be trying, to say the least. S's cousin was supposed to come with his kids from Jacksonville, but he had to cancel, and when he did, S started looking into changing their flight.
I'm not sure exactly what this portends for our future visits, but it probably means there will be fewer of them and they will be shorter. It's not like Columbia, South Carolina, where S's parents used to live, is a hub of activity, but there are other kids in the neighborhood, and we easily could take the boys to playgrounds and indoor fun centers, and we could visit friends in Charlotte. Also, we could drive there. It's more convenient/better suited for little kids.
I just don't see how we can afford -- time-wise, money-wise, and mental health-wise -- to spend as much time in Tampa as we did in Columbia. It's too bad for S's parents, but overall I think they will be happier in their new place, so... it is what is. I hate that saying, but sometimes it's very apt.
My time alone was seriously some time alone. I mean, I went to work and the gym and stuff. But I didn't do anything "fun." I realized that my social life is 95% family activities -- cookouts, birthday parties, play dates, all with other parents with kids. I play trivia on Sunday nights sometimes, but if that's off (as it was the past two weeks), then I don't really do anything social without kids. This isn't necessarily a bad thing. It's a simple matter of resource allocation. I just don't have the capacity in my life right now for a robust non-kid social life. If I didn't have a family, then I would build one, but I do have a family, so I don't. It also doesn't help that my O.G. DC friends, the ones I could always count on for sports watching and beer drinking, have all moved away. Most recently, my friend R moved to Columbus, Ohio to be with her boyfriend, and I doubt she's ever coming back, since they're getting married in November -- so selfish of her, huh?
Actually, I was in the process of getting a poker game going for tonight, when S changed her ticket, prompting me to cancel it, so that I could pick them up at the airport. She said that they could take an Uber back, but she'd have to get one with car seats, which is a pain, and it would be expensive (from Dulles), and, I dunno, it just feels weird to make my family, whom I haven't seen in two weeks, take an Uber back from the airport, while I play poker. I would feel guilty about it, even if it's because S changed her ticket. Also, some people were being wishy-washy or non-responsive about the game, which was annoying me, and by going to the airport tonight, I will accumulate goodwill, so that I can play trivia with emotional impunity tomorrow night. So, it's not entirely a selfless act by me -- but it is mostly one.
Come to think of it, I did do one social thing this week. I went to dinner with a bunch of Krav Maga folks on Thursday. The wrestling instructor is leaving for college this weekend (he's only 18 years old!), and so some of the longtime students planned a going away dinner for him. I happened to be around when everybody was leaving, because I took his last class, so I just tagged along. We went to a barbecue joint, and I got a half-rack of pork ribs and a loaded baked potato. It definitely beat the scrambled eggs I would have eaten. (Actually, I make some bomb scrambled eggs. I put peppers, onions, and sausage in them and top it with cheese. Add a let little hot sauce, and that's good eatin'.)
It's one of those things that's kinda awkward, where I've seen everybody hundreds of times before, because we've all been taking classes together for the past three years or whatever, but a lot of the people I haven't really ever talked to, and I don't know their names, or if I do, it's only because I've heard other people say it. Also, there's a sizable age gap. I think I was the oldest person there by at least ten years, and some of the people, like the instructor, are barely out of high school. (I think one girl there is still in high school.) I heard somebody on a podcast say, "We all think of ourselves as being 15 years younger than we actually are," and that is so true. In my mind, high school wasn't all that long ago. I feel like I just finished it five or six years ago. In actuality, it was literally a generation ago. I'm the same age as the parents of many high school kids -- and not super young parents. If I had a kid at 27, well within the range of normal, they would be in high school by now. This is absolutely mind-boggling to me. My best friend has a kid in high school, and it's still absolutely mind-boggling to me. I can never not be amazed, and more than slightly freaked out, by how fast time has moved for me since I turned 14. Before then time went so slowly. I remember visiting my older teenage cousins when I was 10 -- they looked like behemoths to me, full-grown men, with muscles and facial hair -- and thinking to myself how far out of reach that seemed. The four years between ten and 14 took longer than the 28 years from 14 to 42. It's the paradox of aging.
But who cares, right? People are people, and it's fun to interact with people of all ages. I'm never going to be one of those snobs who gets off on denigrating other generations. I absolutely despise it when people do this. I hate it when people my age bash millennials, and I hate it just as much when young 'uns make fun of old people for no other reason than being old. As Sarah Silverman once said, "I'm sorry I haven't died yet." And not to get all Marianne Williamson on you, but it's an amazing cosmic quirk that we all exist together, right now, on this minuscule speck of rock, orbiting one of hundreds of billions of stars in the known universe. Why can't we recognize that and live with love, in unity?
And with that I think I will exit now. I'm going to watch an episode of Stranger Things from season two. I'm not all that into it,* to be honest, but S wants me to watch season three with her, so I need to catch up.
Until next time...
*My problem with this show, and it's why I'm not a huge fantasy guy in general, is that there's way too much unexplained shit going on. It's fine to have suspense and mystery, but they need to start bringing it together. What is the Upside-Down, and how can one get into it? There's that portal in the lab, but then that kid Will gets sucked into when he doesn't want to -- how does that happen? And now there's something living in him Zuul-style? Is that the same type of creature as that gremlin that ate that kid's cat? And where does Eleven go when she transports to visit people? Is that the Upside-Down? If so, why doesn't she go fight that monster and help Will? Actually, why is Eleven even in this season? She hasn't done anything but eaten waffles and broken windows in a cabin. Her story line couldn't be more boring. They probably should have killed her off last season. I know she's popular, but great shows recognize when a character, even a beloved character, has run their course, and she's apparently run her course. Anyway, the last episode left me hopeful that some things will starting getting resolved, so I'll keep watching. I just hope there is some sort of payoff soon.
S's parents try to help out, especially her mom, but she has trouble physically keeping up with them. S's dad will hang out with them, but only on his terms. Once they start getting a little bit rambunctious (i.e., act like normal kids their age), he gets frustrated and gets upset or retreats to another room. So, it's mostly on us when we visit her parents, and when you're alone, it can be trying, to say the least. S's cousin was supposed to come with his kids from Jacksonville, but he had to cancel, and when he did, S started looking into changing their flight.
I'm not sure exactly what this portends for our future visits, but it probably means there will be fewer of them and they will be shorter. It's not like Columbia, South Carolina, where S's parents used to live, is a hub of activity, but there are other kids in the neighborhood, and we easily could take the boys to playgrounds and indoor fun centers, and we could visit friends in Charlotte. Also, we could drive there. It's more convenient/better suited for little kids.
I just don't see how we can afford -- time-wise, money-wise, and mental health-wise -- to spend as much time in Tampa as we did in Columbia. It's too bad for S's parents, but overall I think they will be happier in their new place, so... it is what is. I hate that saying, but sometimes it's very apt.
My time alone was seriously some time alone. I mean, I went to work and the gym and stuff. But I didn't do anything "fun." I realized that my social life is 95% family activities -- cookouts, birthday parties, play dates, all with other parents with kids. I play trivia on Sunday nights sometimes, but if that's off (as it was the past two weeks), then I don't really do anything social without kids. This isn't necessarily a bad thing. It's a simple matter of resource allocation. I just don't have the capacity in my life right now for a robust non-kid social life. If I didn't have a family, then I would build one, but I do have a family, so I don't. It also doesn't help that my O.G. DC friends, the ones I could always count on for sports watching and beer drinking, have all moved away. Most recently, my friend R moved to Columbus, Ohio to be with her boyfriend, and I doubt she's ever coming back, since they're getting married in November -- so selfish of her, huh?
Actually, I was in the process of getting a poker game going for tonight, when S changed her ticket, prompting me to cancel it, so that I could pick them up at the airport. She said that they could take an Uber back, but she'd have to get one with car seats, which is a pain, and it would be expensive (from Dulles), and, I dunno, it just feels weird to make my family, whom I haven't seen in two weeks, take an Uber back from the airport, while I play poker. I would feel guilty about it, even if it's because S changed her ticket. Also, some people were being wishy-washy or non-responsive about the game, which was annoying me, and by going to the airport tonight, I will accumulate goodwill, so that I can play trivia with emotional impunity tomorrow night. So, it's not entirely a selfless act by me -- but it is mostly one.
Come to think of it, I did do one social thing this week. I went to dinner with a bunch of Krav Maga folks on Thursday. The wrestling instructor is leaving for college this weekend (he's only 18 years old!), and so some of the longtime students planned a going away dinner for him. I happened to be around when everybody was leaving, because I took his last class, so I just tagged along. We went to a barbecue joint, and I got a half-rack of pork ribs and a loaded baked potato. It definitely beat the scrambled eggs I would have eaten. (Actually, I make some bomb scrambled eggs. I put peppers, onions, and sausage in them and top it with cheese. Add a let little hot sauce, and that's good eatin'.)
It's one of those things that's kinda awkward, where I've seen everybody hundreds of times before, because we've all been taking classes together for the past three years or whatever, but a lot of the people I haven't really ever talked to, and I don't know their names, or if I do, it's only because I've heard other people say it. Also, there's a sizable age gap. I think I was the oldest person there by at least ten years, and some of the people, like the instructor, are barely out of high school. (I think one girl there is still in high school.) I heard somebody on a podcast say, "We all think of ourselves as being 15 years younger than we actually are," and that is so true. In my mind, high school wasn't all that long ago. I feel like I just finished it five or six years ago. In actuality, it was literally a generation ago. I'm the same age as the parents of many high school kids -- and not super young parents. If I had a kid at 27, well within the range of normal, they would be in high school by now. This is absolutely mind-boggling to me. My best friend has a kid in high school, and it's still absolutely mind-boggling to me. I can never not be amazed, and more than slightly freaked out, by how fast time has moved for me since I turned 14. Before then time went so slowly. I remember visiting my older teenage cousins when I was 10 -- they looked like behemoths to me, full-grown men, with muscles and facial hair -- and thinking to myself how far out of reach that seemed. The four years between ten and 14 took longer than the 28 years from 14 to 42. It's the paradox of aging.
But who cares, right? People are people, and it's fun to interact with people of all ages. I'm never going to be one of those snobs who gets off on denigrating other generations. I absolutely despise it when people do this. I hate it when people my age bash millennials, and I hate it just as much when young 'uns make fun of old people for no other reason than being old. As Sarah Silverman once said, "I'm sorry I haven't died yet." And not to get all Marianne Williamson on you, but it's an amazing cosmic quirk that we all exist together, right now, on this minuscule speck of rock, orbiting one of hundreds of billions of stars in the known universe. Why can't we recognize that and live with love, in unity?
And with that I think I will exit now. I'm going to watch an episode of Stranger Things from season two. I'm not all that into it,* to be honest, but S wants me to watch season three with her, so I need to catch up.
Until next time...
*My problem with this show, and it's why I'm not a huge fantasy guy in general, is that there's way too much unexplained shit going on. It's fine to have suspense and mystery, but they need to start bringing it together. What is the Upside-Down, and how can one get into it? There's that portal in the lab, but then that kid Will gets sucked into when he doesn't want to -- how does that happen? And now there's something living in him Zuul-style? Is that the same type of creature as that gremlin that ate that kid's cat? And where does Eleven go when she transports to visit people? Is that the Upside-Down? If so, why doesn't she go fight that monster and help Will? Actually, why is Eleven even in this season? She hasn't done anything but eaten waffles and broken windows in a cabin. Her story line couldn't be more boring. They probably should have killed her off last season. I know she's popular, but great shows recognize when a character, even a beloved character, has run their course, and she's apparently run her course. Anyway, the last episode left me hopeful that some things will starting getting resolved, so I'll keep watching. I just hope there is some sort of payoff soon.
Season 2 does pick up the pace as it goes along and Eleven gets out of the cabin. Don't get your hopes up that everything will be explained because nobody understands what the upside-down is or how it works (the Duffers said they based the creature somewhat on the shark from Jaws and part of what makes it so terrifying is you don't understand its motivations, you can't predict its behavior, and you never know when it will show up). What I enjoy most about Stranger Things is the characters. I relate to Eleven because I often felt that sense of frustration at her age--believe me, if I could have blown out all of the windows in our house when I was mad, I would have--and I also relate to Joyce because if some Zuul-type ever possesses one of my boys, it had better watch the fuck out. I get what you are saying about the fantasy stuff, but if you let that go and focus on the characters, there is development and dimensionality.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I enjoyed the last few episodes so much more than the first. The characters are pretty great. They definitely make the show. I'll watch season three.
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