Entry 706: Anniversary Olio

Today is my and S's 14th wedding anniversary -- our legal one, per the state of Virginia.* We have another anniversary in August of our Indian ceremony, which some of S's family members think is our real wedding date, but we don't celebrate that one, and I can't even remember the exact date. It's August, 2011, maybe the 6th? We also have a third anniversary date that we used to cite in certain company -- sometime in late summer 2010 -- because, since we got married so fast (for visa purposes when we went to Australia for a year), there were some political/familial considerations about whom we told and when, and so it was easier at that moment to announce to some people that we were getting married, not that we already were married. I figured it was an okay lie to tell because soon enough nobody would care and everybody would forget all about it. And so, verily, here we are, whereby even I've forgotten the date, and it was my fake anniversary.

*We picked Virginia instead of DC because, at the time, you had to get an STD test in order to obtain a marriage license in DC. It sounds weird, but it's true. Even weirder, I believe it was just the woman who had to get tested when we were looking into it. Virginia had no such restrictions. (Sexist, I know.) Also, when S and I first met we both worked near the Courthouse Metro stop in Arlington (she had a real job; I was doing a summer internship), and would sometimes meet for lunch, so we had a connection to the area. 

It's funny how our anniversary works. S kinda treats it more like her birthday than our anniversary. Today, she kept asking me to do things with/for her, and then she would add, "as an anniversary gift." After about the third thing, I was like, "Y'know, it's actually my anniversary too." But I was mostly joking. I hate planning things, so I appreciate she does it, and making my wife happy on our anniversary is a gift of its own.

It is also Holi, the Hindu holiday of color, today (tomorrow, technically), so we went to a Hindu temple to celebrate. I'm not usually down with the religious stuff, but I am down with the notion of community, so I'll tag along sometimes. It's fine. The Hindu ceremonies are way better than a mass or a sermon, if you're an interloper like me, because you don't have to sit there in silent boredom for hours. Everything is out in the open, there's a bunch of people chanting, and you can sit on the floor or just mill around, looking at the displays of the various gods, saying a little prayer (or pretending to) and even offering a piece of fruit, as you pass by. You can come and go as you wish, so you never feel trapped. Also, today they had half-decent dosas, which was nice.

Sometimes I think that I should give religion a try, like a real try, but the thought passes pretty quickly. It's like when I think I should become vegan or take up quantum physics. The thing is, I have this thing about me that I absolutely cannot make myself believe something that I don't believe. That's why I've never found Pascal's wager particularly compelling. Betting that there is a God, even behaving as if there is one, is not the same thing as actually believing in one, and my understanding of most major religions is that it's that belief that gets you into eternal paradise. So, if you can't make myself believe, the entire proposition seems moot to me. Also, you not only have to wager on whether or not there is a God, but what is the right way to worship. After all, as Homer Simpson said, "And what if we've picked the wrong religion? Every week we're just making god madder and madder." So, I think I'll just stick to my pseudo-intellectual skepticism.

Alright, short post this week. It's late, and I need to get some sleep. Monday is an in-office day for me, and I haven't slept well the past few nights. I think it's our flannel sheets. S loves them, and they are really soft, but they are so goddamn hot. It's like there's a trapped pocket of heat under my back at all times. I've woken up in the middle of the night drenched in sweat the past two nights and have had trouble getting back to sleep (in part because there was a mini puddle of perspiration on my side of the bed). We had to wash the sheets, and I convinced S to replace them with non-flannel ones, so I'm hoping tonight will be less moist and more restful.

Until next time...