Back from the west coast, enjoying my "buffer day", i.e., the day after you return from vacation before you go back to work. I have a tendency to want to stretch my trips as long as possible, but I've learned through experience at least one buffer day is needed. Getting in late Sunday night and then going to work Monday morning is completely miserable. You need a buffer day.
Our house was completely in tact upon return, which is nice. We have no pets, and our mail box is a slot in the door, so it's relatively easy for us to travel. The yard maintenance people came while we were away, so we came home to a freshly edged front lawn, which, I must say, was absolutely delightful. The only bad part about returning was that S accidentally left out half a kiwi on the kitchen counter, so there was a swarm of fruit flies in our kitchen -- pretty gross, but fruit flies are harmless and rather easy to get rid of, you just dispose of the rotting fruit.
Oh, actually, there was another bad part about coming home: I'm sad! Not super-depressed sad, but Sunday-night-after-a-great-weekend sad. We got to see both S's and my families on this trip, and it was really great. It's such a shame we're all spread out across the country. In fact that's my biggest problem with the U.S. -- it's too big. We should consolidate, so we can all be closer together. Let's be honest, we can do away with most of the middle of the country and hardly skip a beat (we can lop off the South while we're at it, just for good measure). Sure, we'd have to sacrifice some good farmland and beautiful sprawling scenery, but if I could drive from D.C. to Seattle to San Diego to New York in a few hours, it'd be worth it. Plus, we'd wipe out the Bible Belt almost entirely, not my main objective, but a great side-effect.
Anyway, the vacation was fun. As I predicted in my last entry it was not relaxing per se -- the little guy (and the time change) had us up before 7 a.m. pretty much every day -- but it was better than relaxing, it was satisfying. We did a lot of things and saw a lot of people. Here's a day-by-day recap, because if there's one thing people are interested in, it's the details of other people's vacations.
Day 1: June 30, L.A.
Our first stop was a visit to S's cousin and her family in L.A. S's cousin is of Indian heritage (like S) but was raised in England (unlike S), and when we first got there she explained that she wasn't normally a typical obsequious Indian woman, but that she was going to play the role of one because she hadn't seen S in years, and it was our first time meeting. Then play the role she did. It got to be a little much, truth be told. The funny thing about having somebody constantly fuss over you is that it usually does exactly the opposite of what's intended. It makes you feels less at home and more stressed out, because you feel compelled to do/eat/drink/use whatever is prepared for you. With that said, I very much enjoyed our stay. S's cousin is incredibly sweet, her four-year old daughter is a little cutie (although S's cousin kept referring to her and Lil' S as brother and sister, which annoyed me for some reason), and her husband is a cool guy -- he took me on a little impromptu tour of Hollywood and it's neighboring environs, which I liked and appreciated. I saw the theater where they host The Oscars. It looks just like a building.
Day 2: July 1, L.A.
We only stayed one night with S's cousin, so we left a day after arriving to head up to Camarillo, CA to visit S's old friends L & A (L & A, and we were in L.A., what an amazing coincidence!) for a few days. (S let it slip to her cousin that we were staying two nights with her friends and only one night with her; it didn't go over well). But before we split town we had lunch with an old friend of S's from college -- a white guy who, as it so happened, married and just had a baby with a South Indian-American woman, so there was some symmetry across the table. I think S's friend's wife is even less "Indian" than S is, which is really saying something considering S once had an ongoing joke with a coworker, who was born and raised in India, that she was a "fake Indian". All I have to say about that is if you can speak the obscure dialect of Kannada fluently there's nothing fake about you. Heck, just knowing what Kannada is allows you to claim 10% honorary Indian-ness.
Anyway, I've mentioned before in this blog that S and I pretty much have the same two or three arguments over and over manifested in different ways. One of them is me being too critical (her view) and her being too sensitive and taking non-personal remarks personally (my view). This came into play when she booked lunch with her friends for 3:00 pm. I did the math on this one: 3:00 pm start time, 4:30-ish end time, we're driving out of L.A. to Camarillo about 60 miles away, L.A. literally has the worse traffic in the country, we have a baby who doesn't like sitting in a car seat... You can see where I'm going with this. I broached the subject with S, and I'll give you multiple choice as to her response:
a) "Wow, I didn't consider that. Excellent observation dear husband. Thank you. I shall call my friend and reschedule, pronto."
b) "Hey, if you don't like it then you can do all the planning on your own from now on like I do!"
(See below for answer.*)
Ultimately I "won" this round, we bumped lunch up a few hours, we had a pleasant meal, and we were on our way to Camarillo before rush hour began.
Day 3: July 2, Camarillo, CA
The contrast in hosting styles between S's cousin and her friends L & A became obvious when I went without lunch. L & A have two little kids, a six-year old girl, and a two-year old boy. The girls (A, her daughter, and S) all went shopping at some sort of "a-ma-zing" (S's description) outlet mall, while the dudes (L, his son, Lil' S, and me) stayed home. At some point before lunch we all took naps (I actually read Doc: A Memoir while Lil' S slept by my side, but you get my point). A few hours later after Lil' S awoke, we moseyed out of the guestroom to hang out. The girls weren't back yet, L was on his laptop, and I noticed there was a used plate by his side. He had obviously prepared himself something for lunch, and since I was in the guestroom with Lil' S he didn't offer me anything. Then he apparently just forgot about it by the time we emerged, so I went without lunch.
Now, obviously I could've asked for something, or asked where the nearest supermarket was, or something, but L is predominantly S's friend, I like him a lot, but I don't know him all that well, and I have a weird social tick where I don't like asking people for things I don't know super well (I don't even like asking a store employee where something is), so instead I just didn't eat. It wasn't a huge deal; we had been eating like crazy the entire trip; I could stand to miss a meal. Plus, I knew we were going out for dinner later, so I could just gorge myself then, which I did. Baby back ribs. Heavenly.
As I allude to above, I actually prefer a more laissez-faire hosting style (the odd missed lunch notwithstanding), and our time with L & A was terrific, if brief. They're really great people; I could see S and I hanging out with them regularly if we were all in the same city. And actually I wouldn't mind living in Camarillo. It's a cool little city tucked between the mountains, with a nice community feel, and beautiful weather. If it offered a bunch of jobs in international development and operations research, us moving there might actually be realistic.
Day 4: July 3, L.A.
Back to L.A. to catch a flight to Sea-Tac, but before we leave town we meet my cousin C who recently moved to Santa Monica for lunch. We have a nice but brief visit (a recurring theme in our trip to So-Cal). After lunch we took a stroll to the Santa Monica pier. S held Lil' S's hands and walked him on the beach. It was his first experience with sand; he seemed indifferent to it.
We didn't buy Lil' S a seat for the LAX to Sea-Tac flight, but it couldn't have gone smoother. He literally slept the entire flight. He sprawled across our laps and dozed off while we were taxiing to the runway, and then we had to wake him up after landing. He was pretty good on the cross-country flight, as well. I joked to S that we had just used up all our "good baby flying karma". Which, unfortunately, was all to prophetic, but I'll get to that later.
Day 5: July 4, Totten Inlet, WA
After settling in at my parents' place (a.k.a the house I grew up in) in University Place, Washington where we'd be spending the next ten days, we headed to my friend JW's family's beach house on the Totten Inlet near Olympia to spend Independence Day. JW and his wife Y live in Japan now, so it was fortuitous they were in town. It was great to see them. Much of JW's extended family was there as well, and they're... I guess I'll just say odd for lack of a better word. They don't interact in a way that's socially typical. I don't mind it, on the contrary I find it entertaining, but I think it can be confusing initially to somebody like S who hasn't experienced it.
The day was quite fun, although we quickly learned of all the holidays the Fourth of July is probably the least suitable for a ten-month old baby. (New Year's is up there, but at least with New Year's all the really loud noises are confined to about a five minute period around midnight. On the night of the Fourth we were hearing loud booms for hours.) There was no way we could stay for fireworks unfortunately. Part of the problem is that the beach house is a small cottage; there is no good place to put a little guy down for the night. S, being the great wife that she is**, sat in the car for an hour or so while Lil' S napped in the car seat so that we could stay longer, but being out much past 7 p.m. just wasn't practical. So, we split without seeing a single firework -- nary a Saturn Missile nor a Piccolo Pete, not even a Pop-it.
Day 6: July 5, U.P.
The first "off" day of the vacation. We didn't do much. My sister K came over to my parents with her kids B (7) and G (5), and we just hung out, wrestled, made paper airplanes (B is really into origami right now), and ate junk food. This is how I envisioned spending my vacation.
Alright. I'm out of time. It's late, and I still have a few things to do. Don't worry, part two of this enthralling*** post will be up in a few days.
Until next time...
*The answer is b. In S's defense, we were both tired, she did do the majority of the planning, and I've been told my delivery sometimes comes off as condescending in a Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory type of way. I prefer to think of it as to the point.
**Or maybe she just needed a break and wanted to watch TV on her iPhone for a little while. Whatever the reason, I'll take it.
***I just put two and two together with the word enthrall. Its base is the word thrall, "a state of servitude or submission" like you're so caught up in something it has a binding, submissive effect on you.
Our house was completely in tact upon return, which is nice. We have no pets, and our mail box is a slot in the door, so it's relatively easy for us to travel. The yard maintenance people came while we were away, so we came home to a freshly edged front lawn, which, I must say, was absolutely delightful. The only bad part about returning was that S accidentally left out half a kiwi on the kitchen counter, so there was a swarm of fruit flies in our kitchen -- pretty gross, but fruit flies are harmless and rather easy to get rid of, you just dispose of the rotting fruit.
Oh, actually, there was another bad part about coming home: I'm sad! Not super-depressed sad, but Sunday-night-after-a-great-weekend sad. We got to see both S's and my families on this trip, and it was really great. It's such a shame we're all spread out across the country. In fact that's my biggest problem with the U.S. -- it's too big. We should consolidate, so we can all be closer together. Let's be honest, we can do away with most of the middle of the country and hardly skip a beat (we can lop off the South while we're at it, just for good measure). Sure, we'd have to sacrifice some good farmland and beautiful sprawling scenery, but if I could drive from D.C. to Seattle to San Diego to New York in a few hours, it'd be worth it. Plus, we'd wipe out the Bible Belt almost entirely, not my main objective, but a great side-effect.
Anyway, the vacation was fun. As I predicted in my last entry it was not relaxing per se -- the little guy (and the time change) had us up before 7 a.m. pretty much every day -- but it was better than relaxing, it was satisfying. We did a lot of things and saw a lot of people. Here's a day-by-day recap, because if there's one thing people are interested in, it's the details of other people's vacations.
Day 1: June 30, L.A.
Our first stop was a visit to S's cousin and her family in L.A. S's cousin is of Indian heritage (like S) but was raised in England (unlike S), and when we first got there she explained that she wasn't normally a typical obsequious Indian woman, but that she was going to play the role of one because she hadn't seen S in years, and it was our first time meeting. Then play the role she did. It got to be a little much, truth be told. The funny thing about having somebody constantly fuss over you is that it usually does exactly the opposite of what's intended. It makes you feels less at home and more stressed out, because you feel compelled to do/eat/drink/use whatever is prepared for you. With that said, I very much enjoyed our stay. S's cousin is incredibly sweet, her four-year old daughter is a little cutie (although S's cousin kept referring to her and Lil' S as brother and sister, which annoyed me for some reason), and her husband is a cool guy -- he took me on a little impromptu tour of Hollywood and it's neighboring environs, which I liked and appreciated. I saw the theater where they host The Oscars. It looks just like a building.
Day 2: July 1, L.A.
We only stayed one night with S's cousin, so we left a day after arriving to head up to Camarillo, CA to visit S's old friends L & A (L & A, and we were in L.A., what an amazing coincidence!) for a few days. (S let it slip to her cousin that we were staying two nights with her friends and only one night with her; it didn't go over well). But before we split town we had lunch with an old friend of S's from college -- a white guy who, as it so happened, married and just had a baby with a South Indian-American woman, so there was some symmetry across the table. I think S's friend's wife is even less "Indian" than S is, which is really saying something considering S once had an ongoing joke with a coworker, who was born and raised in India, that she was a "fake Indian". All I have to say about that is if you can speak the obscure dialect of Kannada fluently there's nothing fake about you. Heck, just knowing what Kannada is allows you to claim 10% honorary Indian-ness.
Anyway, I've mentioned before in this blog that S and I pretty much have the same two or three arguments over and over manifested in different ways. One of them is me being too critical (her view) and her being too sensitive and taking non-personal remarks personally (my view). This came into play when she booked lunch with her friends for 3:00 pm. I did the math on this one: 3:00 pm start time, 4:30-ish end time, we're driving out of L.A. to Camarillo about 60 miles away, L.A. literally has the worse traffic in the country, we have a baby who doesn't like sitting in a car seat... You can see where I'm going with this. I broached the subject with S, and I'll give you multiple choice as to her response:
a) "Wow, I didn't consider that. Excellent observation dear husband. Thank you. I shall call my friend and reschedule, pronto."
b) "Hey, if you don't like it then you can do all the planning on your own from now on like I do!"
(See below for answer.*)
Ultimately I "won" this round, we bumped lunch up a few hours, we had a pleasant meal, and we were on our way to Camarillo before rush hour began.
[I can't believe I forgot to take a picture of Camarillo while I was there. This impersonal stock photo will have to suffice.]
Day 3: July 2, Camarillo, CA
The contrast in hosting styles between S's cousin and her friends L & A became obvious when I went without lunch. L & A have two little kids, a six-year old girl, and a two-year old boy. The girls (A, her daughter, and S) all went shopping at some sort of "a-ma-zing" (S's description) outlet mall, while the dudes (L, his son, Lil' S, and me) stayed home. At some point before lunch we all took naps (I actually read Doc: A Memoir while Lil' S slept by my side, but you get my point). A few hours later after Lil' S awoke, we moseyed out of the guestroom to hang out. The girls weren't back yet, L was on his laptop, and I noticed there was a used plate by his side. He had obviously prepared himself something for lunch, and since I was in the guestroom with Lil' S he didn't offer me anything. Then he apparently just forgot about it by the time we emerged, so I went without lunch.
Now, obviously I could've asked for something, or asked where the nearest supermarket was, or something, but L is predominantly S's friend, I like him a lot, but I don't know him all that well, and I have a weird social tick where I don't like asking people for things I don't know super well (I don't even like asking a store employee where something is), so instead I just didn't eat. It wasn't a huge deal; we had been eating like crazy the entire trip; I could stand to miss a meal. Plus, I knew we were going out for dinner later, so I could just gorge myself then, which I did. Baby back ribs. Heavenly.
As I allude to above, I actually prefer a more laissez-faire hosting style (the odd missed lunch notwithstanding), and our time with L & A was terrific, if brief. They're really great people; I could see S and I hanging out with them regularly if we were all in the same city. And actually I wouldn't mind living in Camarillo. It's a cool little city tucked between the mountains, with a nice community feel, and beautiful weather. If it offered a bunch of jobs in international development and operations research, us moving there might actually be realistic.
[A highlight from NFL wide receiver Greg Camarillo.]
Day 4: July 3, L.A.
Back to L.A. to catch a flight to Sea-Tac, but before we leave town we meet my cousin C who recently moved to Santa Monica for lunch. We have a nice but brief visit (a recurring theme in our trip to So-Cal). After lunch we took a stroll to the Santa Monica pier. S held Lil' S's hands and walked him on the beach. It was his first experience with sand; he seemed indifferent to it.
We didn't buy Lil' S a seat for the LAX to Sea-Tac flight, but it couldn't have gone smoother. He literally slept the entire flight. He sprawled across our laps and dozed off while we were taxiing to the runway, and then we had to wake him up after landing. He was pretty good on the cross-country flight, as well. I joked to S that we had just used up all our "good baby flying karma". Which, unfortunately, was all to prophetic, but I'll get to that later.
[The Santana Monica Pier. Again, no good pics from my camera.]
Day 5: July 4, Totten Inlet, WA
After settling in at my parents' place (a.k.a the house I grew up in) in University Place, Washington where we'd be spending the next ten days, we headed to my friend JW's family's beach house on the Totten Inlet near Olympia to spend Independence Day. JW and his wife Y live in Japan now, so it was fortuitous they were in town. It was great to see them. Much of JW's extended family was there as well, and they're... I guess I'll just say odd for lack of a better word. They don't interact in a way that's socially typical. I don't mind it, on the contrary I find it entertaining, but I think it can be confusing initially to somebody like S who hasn't experienced it.
The day was quite fun, although we quickly learned of all the holidays the Fourth of July is probably the least suitable for a ten-month old baby. (New Year's is up there, but at least with New Year's all the really loud noises are confined to about a five minute period around midnight. On the night of the Fourth we were hearing loud booms for hours.) There was no way we could stay for fireworks unfortunately. Part of the problem is that the beach house is a small cottage; there is no good place to put a little guy down for the night. S, being the great wife that she is**, sat in the car for an hour or so while Lil' S napped in the car seat so that we could stay longer, but being out much past 7 p.m. just wasn't practical. So, we split without seeing a single firework -- nary a Saturn Missile nor a Piccolo Pete, not even a Pop-it.
Day 6: July 5, U.P.
The first "off" day of the vacation. We didn't do much. My sister K came over to my parents with her kids B (7) and G (5), and we just hung out, wrestled, made paper airplanes (B is really into origami right now), and ate junk food. This is how I envisioned spending my vacation.
Alright. I'm out of time. It's late, and I still have a few things to do. Don't worry, part two of this enthralling*** post will be up in a few days.
Until next time...
*The answer is b. In S's defense, we were both tired, she did do the majority of the planning, and I've been told my delivery sometimes comes off as condescending in a Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory type of way. I prefer to think of it as to the point.
**Or maybe she just needed a break and wanted to watch TV on her iPhone for a little while. Whatever the reason, I'll take it.
***I just put two and two together with the word enthrall. Its base is the word thrall, "a state of servitude or submission" like you're so caught up in something it has a binding, submissive effect on you.
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